I Have Infinite Aura Points

I’ve been thinking about my aura for a long time. Not aura in the new age sense. If I’m ever radiating color, please take me to the emergency room! No, I mean aura the way Gen Z coined the expression. Or rather, from what I know about Gen Z slang, the way Black people coined the expression.

Aura is another term for a person’s cool, confidence, and stylishness. Aura is jokingly measured in points on social media. If I jumped off the roof and did a cannonball into the pool, I would gain aura points. If I jumped off the roof and did a cannonball onto my neighbor, I would lose aura points. Also, once again, please take me to the emergency room!

My career has been defined by “aura.” Thank god there’s a term for it, so I can articulate a thought I’ve had for years.

When I was in college, I had a screenwriting professor named Charles Evered. He’s a successful playwright and screenwriter who wrote on Monk. I never thought to ask him if Tony Schalub is as awesome as I assume he is. I may never know… *Stares Wistfully*

Professor Evered was a great teacher! He gave great lectures on the art of storytelling, and he was very encouraging. He once explained to me that many of his students had one story in them they needed to tell, then they would quit. Charles thought I was an excellent writer who would be writing stories for years to come.

One day, Professor Evered had a guest lecturer come in to speak with us. I forget his name. The guest was a fellow screenwriter who imparted his tricks of the trade onto us. The one I remember was to become friendly with agents’ assistants. They’re not only the gatekeepers to the agents’ schedules, but they become agents and power players themselves someday. Things like that. After the lecturer left, Professor Evered told us to forget all those hacky tricks. Then he gave us his universal advice about making it in the industry: “Do good work and be a good person.” If you do those two things, you will succeed, because people will naturally want to work with you.

I took his advice to heart.

And my heart was broken again and again and again.

Yes, I did get steady work as a writer in Los Angeles, even as a young writer, but it was outside of film and TV. I wrote video games, comics, internet articles, and scripted podcasts. I impressed many editors and creative directors. They hired me multiple times. When I asked them for recommendations, they noted how talented and collaborative I was. From my perspective, I was doing good work and being a good person. Why did film and TV always elude me? I pitched TV shows to executives, but never got to round two. I pitched episodes for animated series to story editors, but I was always met with rejection. I wrote screenplays that no producers would read. I wrote audition packets for comedy institutions and never heard back. I couldn’t even make my way in the UCB Theater (once considered a stepping stone to the industry) even after doing good work and being a good person in my classes.

It wasn’t all doom and gloom for me in The Showbiz. I was selected to be part of a talent incubator at Warner Bros… for web series. My wife Amanda and I wrote several episodes of a streaming show… on the tiny, forgotten Nerdist streamer. I wrote a translation for a Korean anime movie… which was entirely rewritten and I got no credit on. I never managed to achieve an unqualified success in TV and film in all my years of trying. I never got my Monk.

If I was speaking to a class of aspiring screenwriters, I couldn’t tell them in good conscience that all they needed to do to succeed was do good work and be a good person. For one, the industry has disintegrated to the point where TV showrunners now fight for job scraps in AI training farms. Even abusive micro-drama productions are increasingly using AI to generate video content. The party died about a decade after I gave up trying to find the location. But I also think my professor’s advice was well-intentioned, but not realistic. It takes more than kindness and quality. It takes aura.

I believe most people who succeed in the industry exude confidence and/or style. I don’t mean you need to be a GQ model to direct an episode of Margo’s Got Money Troubles. There are many nerds with aura. Dropout is stacked with them. When you have enough aura, you don’t have to pitch. People pitch you. When you have enough aura, your TikToks go viral. Patreon money flows like a river into your bank account. Talent is useful, but there are lots of people with talent, and talent can be improved. You can learn how to write, sing, dance, draw, film, and program. My theory is that aura is less moldable. It’s something we sense in others, like gaydar. People who try to fake it or buy it come off poorly, like Lauren Bezos at the MET Gala.

That said, I don’t believe aura is a you-have-it-or-you-don’t kind of thing. This is where the phrase “aura points” comes in handy for me, even if its use is largely ironic. I believe everyone has some amount of aura, but a few people have a lot of aura. You might be the funniest person in your office, but when you try to become a professional stand-up, that’s when you discover the people in the scene with big auras. They’re not always the funniest comics, but they’re the ones you can sense are most likely to break big.

For years, I thought about how much aura I have. When I started writing this newsletter, I wondered if there was a way to find out. Based on the circumstantial evidence of my career, I’d guess I have more aura points than the average game dev and fewer aura points than the average Hollywood screenwriter. I have enough aura points to make good conversation at parties, but not so many aura points that people whisper excitedly when I enter the party. I have enough aura points to go viral once per decade maybe.

Since I’ve never been one to self-diagnose, I decided I needed a way to scientifically measure my current accumulation of aura points. So I took a Buzzfeed quiz. I know, millennial cringe. I probably lost aura points just by thinking about Buzzfeed. But in a few questions, I had my diagnosis. According to the certified aura clinician who designed the test, I have “Infinite” aura points.

You’re the coolest!!!! You don’t need aura points to define you; you just do whatever you want, whether people like it or not, but because you are you, everyone will love you anyway. People may follow, but you are always a leader. A leader doesn’t always mean being outgoing or on the front lines. You are the main character of your storyline and the leader of your own life. You simply just don’t care, and we love that for you. People can never get on your level because they’re trying too hard, while you don’t even need to try to make people like you. You truly are unmatched!!!👏🥰

Nice! I got the little applause guy and everything.

There’s one aspect of this I know is true. Ever since I told myself I would no longer pursue The Show Business, I “simply just don’t care.” I stopped being jealous of other peoples’ success. I wear clothes because I like how they look, not because of how I want others to see me. I socialize with real friends, not people I hope will get me closer to a writer’s room. I’m happy working as a narrative designer. I’m proud and grateful for my career. I’ve turned down opportunities to pitch Hollywood again. “Opportunities,” lol.

No doubt my shift in attitude over the past few years has increased my aura points. I know I’m not at “infinite” points, but I have more than enough to lead a joyful and creatively fulfilling life. I’ll take it.

🎲 Your Turn: Are you a cool person? Trick question. If you read my newsletter all the way to the bottom, you are undeniably cool, but do you think of yourself as cool? How has being cool or not being cool affected your life? Do you get the exact same result from that Buzzfeed quiz? Take it and share your results. I’m curious if you can get negative aura points. Reply directly to this email or hit the orange button below to leave a comment.

Image by catalyststuff on Magnific